Romans 14 — The Faith That Makes Room for Imperfect People

Douglas B Vandergraph

02 Dec 2025 — 8 min read

There are chapters in Scripture that sharpen our thinking, chapters that confront our behavior, and chapters that command us to rise higher. Then there are chapters like Romans 14—chapters that reach deep into the wounds, tensions, divisions, emotions, and misunderstandings that happen inside real communities of faith.

Romans 14 is Paul stepping into the messy reality of believers who all love Jesus… but don’t always love each other well. It is a call to maturity. A call to humility. A call to compassion. A call to stop making stumbling blocks out of small things. A call to step out of our opinions long enough to remember that every believer you meet—strong or weak, bold or timid, confident or unsure—is a servant of the same Master you serve.

Romans 14 is the blueprint for a church that heals instead of wounds… that builds instead of breaks… that listens instead of labels… that welcomes instead of rejects.

And in a world that is louder, angrier, more polarized, and more divided than ever, Romans 14 might be the single most needed message for the church in 2025.

The Chapter Where God Teaches Us to Breathe Again

If Romans 12 tells us how to love…
If Romans 13 tells us how to honor…
Then Romans 14 tells us how to live with people who don’t do faith the way we do.

Because let’s be honest—every one of us has opinions. Preferences. Traditions. Convictions. Interpretations. Things we feel strongly about. Things we were taught growing up. Things we believe are central, even when they’re actually optional.

The early church was no different.
They disagreed on diet.
They disagreed on special days.
They disagreed on what was holy and what wasn’t.
They disagreed on what faith looked like in practice.

Paul steps into these disagreements—not to silence one side or elevate the other, but to show them the deeper truth that sits underneath every disagreement:

God is the one who holds His servants.
God is the one who judges His servants.
God is the one who strengthens His servants.
God is the one who grows His servants.

We don’t need to be the judge.
We don’t need to be the standard.
We don’t need to be the measuring stick.
We don’t need to make every battle our battle.

Romans 14 anchors the church in the humility that frees it from unnecessary conflict.

“Accept the one whose faith is weak—without quarreling over disputable matters.”

Paul begins with a word that is so simple and so world-changing: accept.

Not tolerate.
Not “deal with.”
Not “put up with.”
Not “try not to get annoyed by.”

But accept.

This word is relational.
This word is emotional.
This word is intentional.
This word requires humility.

Accept the one whose faith is weak—not because you agree, but because you are strong.

Spiritual maturity is not proven by how many verses you can quote, how many doctrines you can defend, or how boldly you argue your point.

Spiritual maturity is proven by how well you receive the people who haven’t grown to where you are yet.

A spiritually mature believer can live with tension, navigate differences, and remain loving even when they don’t get their way. That’s the mark of strength. That’s the mark of Christ.

Paul then adds a phrase that hits like a hammer in 2025:

“…without quarreling over disputable matters.”

Disputable matters.
Not salvation issues.
Not gospel issues.
Not moral absolutes.
Not the non-negotiables of the faith.

Disputable matters.
Secondary issues.
Cultural differences.
Traditions.
Preferences.
Opinions.
Interpretations that faithful Christians disagree about.

Paul is telling the church:

Don’t lose the unity of the kingdom over the opinions of men.

The Church That Forgot How to Listen

We live in a time where believers argue about everything.
Absolutely everything.

Music styles.
Bible translations.
Holiday traditions.
Conservative vs. progressive.
The “right” way to pray.
The “right” way to worship.
The “right” way to raise kids.
The “right” food, clothes, habits, boundaries, teachings, programs, and spiritual practices.

If it exists, someone is arguing about it.

Romans 14 calls us back to a path of peace.

Paul tells the strong believer:
“Don’t look down on the one who is still growing.”

He tells the weak believer:
“Don’t judge the one whose freedom is greater than yours.”

And then he says the line we all need tattooed on our hearts:

“Who are you to judge someone else’s servant?”

Read that again slowly.

Every believer belongs to God.
Every believer answers to God.
Every believer is shaped by God.
Every believer grows at God’s pace.
Every believer is upheld by God’s grace.

When we step into judgment, we step into a role that does not belong to us and was never given to us.

You don’t have the whole picture.
You don’t know their story.
You don’t know their wounds.
You don’t know their history.
You don’t know their battles.
You don’t know what God is doing in them behind the scenes.

Judgment sees the surface.
Grace sees the soul.

Judgment demands perfection.
Grace makes room for the process.

Judgment isolates.
Grace draws near.

If you want to walk like Jesus, you cannot hold people hostage to where they are right now. You must give them the space, patience, and dignity to grow.

The Lord Makes Them Stand

Paul continues with a sentence that vibrates with divine confidence:

“They will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.”

Not they might stand.
Not if they get stronger.
Not if they believe exactly like you do.
Not if they stop making mistakes.

No—
They will stand
because the Lord Himself is the One
who makes them stand.

This is the heartbeat of Christian unity.

God holds them.
God strengthens them.
God teaches them.
God transforms them.
God carries them.
God corrects them.
God completes them.

We don’t have to play the Holy Spirit in someone else’s life.
We don’t have to micromanage someone else’s growth.
We don’t have to be the enforcer of someone else’s convictions.

God is their Shepherd.
God is their Master.
God is their Judge.
God is their Guide.

And God has a perfect track record of finishing what He starts.

Living Before the Eyes of the Lord

Paul then reframes the entire conversation:
It’s not about food.
It’s not about days.
It’s not about outward practices.

It’s about the heart.
It’s about the Lord.
It’s about living unto Him.

“Whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.”

Every believer stands under the gaze of the same God.
Every believer lives their life in the presence of the same King.
Every believer is driven by a desire to honor Jesus—even when that expression of honor looks different from yours.

One honors Jesus by abstaining.
Another honors Jesus by partaking.

One honors Jesus with caution.
Another honors Jesus with freedom.

One honors Jesus by holding tight to boundaries.
Another honors Jesus by walking in liberty.

Paul isn’t saying everyone is right about everything.
He’s saying everyone is trying.
Everyone is aiming.
Everyone is seeking.

And God understands the heart better than we do.

Stop Judging. Start Building.

Paul says:
“You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister?”

And then again:
“Stop passing judgment.”

Why?
Because we will all stand before the judgment seat of Christ.
Because each of us will give an account to God—not to each other.

And because judgment destroys what God is trying to build.

Then Paul gives the command that every church should carve into the foundation of their heart:

“Make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister.”

You have the power to lift someone up or tear them down.
You have the power to make faith easier or harder for someone.
You have the power to make the road smoother or rougher for the people walking beside you.

Paul is saying:
Don’t create barriers where God created bridges.
Don’t create obstacles where God created open doors.
Don’t create burdens where God created freedom.

A spiritually mature believer doesn’t flaunt their freedom.
They steward it.
They use it wisely.
They lay it down when necessary.
They recognize that freedom without love is not freedom—it’s selfishness.

Love Limits Itself for the Sake of Others

Paul admits something profound:

“I am convinced that nothing is unclean in itself.”

Meaning:
The strong believer is not wrong.
Freedom is real.
Legalism is not maturity.

But then Paul adds the deeper truth:
“If your brother or sister is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love.”

In other words:
You can be right and still be wrong.

You can be right in what you believe…
and wrong in how you treat others.

You can be right in your theology…
and wrong in your spirit.

You can be right about the issue…
and wrong about the way you handle the person.

In the kingdom, the right answer is never more important than the right heart.

Love willingly restricts itself.
Love intentionally sacrifices its preferences.
Love cares more about people than positions.
Love gives up its rights when those rights harm someone else’s walk with God.

This is the Christ-shaped heart of Romans 14.

The Kingdom Is Bigger Than Your Convictions

Paul declares one of the most freeing, clarifying statements in the entire New Testament:

“For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking,
but of righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit.”

If the debate doesn’t produce righteousness, peace, or joy—
it is not a kingdom debate.

If the argument makes you angry…
If the disagreement makes you proud…
If the tension makes you hostile…
If the difference makes you condescending…

Then you’ve stepped out of the kingdom atmosphere and into the world’s.

Disciples don’t fight for their preferences.
They fight for peace.
They pursue what builds, not what breaks.
They chase unity, not uniformity.

The kingdom is not about being right.
It’s about being Christlike.

Your Faith Is Yours Before the Lord

Paul closes the chapter with a final conviction that cuts right through the noise:

“Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves.”

Meaning:
Walk in your convictions boldly.
Walk in your faith sincerely.
Walk in your understanding honestly.

Don’t violate your conscience.
Don’t imitate someone else’s convictions just to fit in.
Don’t pressure others to adopt your convictions just to make yourself comfortable.

And don’t mock the convictions of those who walk differently.

Paul ends with this foundational truth:
“Everything that does not come from faith is sin.”

Not everything that comes from disagreement is sin.
Not everything that comes from difference is sin.
Not everything that comes from diversity is sin.

But everything that is done without faith—without a heart toward God, without sincerity, without trust, without conviction—that is sin.

Romans 14 is ultimately a chapter about honoring God with a clear conscience and treating people with a generous grace.

What This Means for Us Today

Romans 14 calls us to a higher way of living.
A deeper way of loving.
A more mature way of walking.

Here is what Paul is saying to the 2025 believer:

• Leave room for people to grow.
• Do not demand that everyone’s journey look like yours.
• Stop dividing the church over secondary issues.
• Let God handle His children.
• Refuse to weaponize your convictions.
• Use your freedom responsibly.
• Choose unity over drama.
• Build people up, don’t tear them down.
• Protect the weak.
• Honor the strong.
• Walk humbly.
• Keep your conscience clear.
• Let love be your highest law.

Romans 14 is not about avoiding truth.
It’s about avoiding harm.

It’s not about compromising doctrine.
It’s about prioritizing love.

It’s not about lowering standards.
It’s about lifting people.

It’s not about pleasing people.
It’s about walking in the Spirit.

It’s not about winning arguments.
It’s about winning brothers and sisters.

If the modern church lived Romans 14 for 30 days, we would see a transformation in our communities, our relationships, our congregations, our witness, and our world that would stretch far beyond anything we could imagine.

A Final Word to the Believer Reading This

You don’t have to get it all perfect.
You don’t have to agree with everyone.
You don’t have to be a clone of the Christians around you.
You don’t have to suppress your convictions.

But you do have to love.
You do have to build.
You do have to honor.

And you do have to remember this:
Every person you encounter is someone God is actively shaping.

God is patient with them.
Be patient too.

God is working in them.
Trust His timing.

God is growing them.
Give them room.

God is carrying them.
Don’t trip them.

God is transforming them.
Don’t interrupt the process.

Let your life preach grace.
Let your words breathe peace.
Let your heart reflect Christ.
Let your journey inspire hope.

Romans 14 is not just a chapter.
It is a posture.
A lifestyle.
A spiritual discipline.
A daily choice.

The choice to be someone who makes faith feel possible to everyone who encounters you.

Watch Douglas Vandergraph’s inspiring faith-based videos on YouTube

Support the ministry by buying Douglas a coffee